Sad

I just left probably the saddest funeral I have ever been to. Granted I have been blessed with not having been too many funerals, but nonetheless, they have been for people who were sick or older and had lived a rather full life. Today's funeral was for a neighbor, two houses over from us in our culdesac. A neighbor who's son played with our kids and who we chatted with often on days we were all out enjoying the great weather. Shockingly and tragically he committed suicide last Friday out in a country area where he used to fish. I am still in a state of disbelief that our neighborhood has been shaken up by such a loss.

The question "why" was apparent on everyone's face present at the service today. A question we're told not to ask, as there will be no answers. A question, not worth asking, now that the deed is done and all that's really left is an opportunity to celebrate Joseph's life. But what breaks my heart so much more today is seeing our friend, Shannen, Joseph's wife, and their 7 year old son, Noah, having to go through the motions and be a star in a role they didn't ask for in this almost surreal tragic story. And while we didn't know Joseph as well as we would have liked, the entire neighborhood knew that his family was his world, especially Noah. It was rare not to see him outside playing catch or soccer with Noah. Rare not to have him offer a helping hand to anyone, any time it was needed.

Overall, the service was beautiful. Done in a beautiful Catholic church, the same one Joseph and Shannen were married in and the same one connected to the elementary school they have Noah enrolled in. His death was tactfully handled and the fullness of the congregation was an honest representation to how many people Joseph touched with his life. An even more special notion to me, was all of the neighbors within the culdesac were represented and sat mourning together. A feeling that shows just how a neighborhood can become your "home" in a broader sense than just being where your house is located. We are blessed to live in such a place.

Sorry to be such a downer today with a post unlike my others. Just felt the need to share my feelings today. I think the loss of my grandma a week and a half ago and now this tragic turn of events, is making me miss all my loved ones more and wanting to grasp on to every precious moment I can. You never know what life is going to bring you - spread your love daily - you never know really what's going on in someone else's life so you never know how much your smile or simple gesture of help may effect them and their choices. And don't worry, I promise I'll be fine. :) The kids and I have plans to attend the city baseball team's opening game tonight with a friend since Papa Vaughn is working. We have gorgeous, although perhaps a bit too warm, weather predicted for the weekend and no real plans, so we'll be able to just enjoy each other and make some more happy memories.

Arkansas Trip - Part 3

Tuesday night of our trip we squeezed in some time to visit with Aunt Deb and Cousin Emily. They live in Mountain Home and had to work most of the time we were there. Since they live only minutes from the hospice we headed over to their house after we spent a really good 3 hours or so with Grandma in the afternoon. Because we were in such different surroundings and had spent all day at the hospice neither kid had napped. While Big Boy was fine, Boopy fell asleep the minute she was put in the car and the sun went down when we left the hospice. Mind you it was already after 6:oo pm MST and had been raining all day with not so fun thunder and lightning storms that really made Guya jump out of her skin. Needless to say, we made it to Aunt Deb, Uncle Mike and Emily's house where we stayed for about an hour. Boopy slept on their couch the entire time. Big Boy on the other hand made himself right at home, eating an apple and playing with their dog, Scout.

Big Boy & Emily

Emily & Aunt Deb

One problem with road trips and not wanting to bother with the kids inflatable beds each night is that you find yourself having to sleep in between these two crazy sleepers! You're welcome to try it the next time any of you come to visit!

We started our journey home Wednesday morning after a brief stop to say goodbye to Grandma. While it wasn't easy, knowing that this would be the last time we saw her alive, we were so grateful to have made the trip out and be able to spend such quality time with her.

As an effort to make this an educational trip, we tried to introduce the kids to all the wildlife. In Arizona we saw the dinosaurs, New Mexico brought cows, including one dead on the interstate nowhere near a cow pasture, in Oklahoma we saw a dead chicken on the road (I suppose he was trying to cross the street - HaHa - I crack myself up!) and in Arkansas we had the pleasure of meeting an armadillo. And while I should be embarrassed to tell you that we purposefully turned around to get a picture of it, Big Boy did have to go to the bathroom, so a stop on the side of the road for his potty stop was warranted. The armadillo was just a bonus! :)

Cool sky picture that Big Boy took from the back seat.

Ahh..the excitement of calling 911. While taking the only real nap during the trip, Guya had some excitement. She was driving along in Oklahoma and on the opposite side of the interstate she saw these small fires sporadically burning with no one around. At the third fire she woke me up. I snapped the quick picture below. We could actually see the flames. Since it didn't appear to be a "controlled" fire, I pulled out my phone and called 911. There were apparently other "do-gooders" out there that had also called already. Someone had been driving along heading east, pulling over and randomly starting fires. Not cool at all. Guya got to thinking that yes, she had seen a car pull away from the first fire she noticed but initially didn't think much of it. We're glad we tried to help and hopefully they were able to put them out before they caused major damage. It certainly added some excitement to our trip!

Random cute kids pics - they really rode along so well.

Ah..the fun of road trips includes the ever changing scenery. Most of Texas and New Mexico I didn't bother taking pictures. Although the pan handle of Texas is very clean and nice in appearance, there just wasn't much in the way of fun picture scenery. Although Wednesday night as we neared the New Mexico border, somewhere west of Wildorado, Texas there is a strange large number of red lights to the north of interstate 40. They all flash on and off at the same time and look to stretch at least a mile. The real bizarre part is that we haven't found anything to explain what these are for. There is no town nearby and they are randomly placed where it doesn't make sense to be an airport of some kind. Who knows, there are some weird people out there - for all we know it could be some lonely farmer trying to communicate with aliens. They do tend to have a lot of those circular farming fields out there that look strange from the sky - not something we're real used to out in the central valley of California.

Aside from the strange lights, we've decided we really didn't like New Mexico and wanted out of there as fast as we could. Especially given the fact that we nearly hit a couple of deer leaping across the road both in front and in back of us! Then later on, we had a coyote sprint in front of us nearly at midnight as we approached Albuquerque.

Arizona brought us some scenery changes worth photographing. The first one is the snow capped mountain as we neared Flagstaff. Quite strange really going from hot desert to pine trees and snow in a matter of minutes. I'm not sure the northern part of Arizona knows what kind of state it wants to be. But then I guess I could say the same for the extreme differences within California.

You can't consider it a good road trip unless you've seen some petrified wood. Exciting! Even more exiting is the abandoned school bus at the edge of the ledge.

One of the joys of being an older sister is convincing your younger sister to do very silly stuff. We, okay me, didn't properly pay attention to "Madge" our GPS and ended up directing us WAY off the interstate heading towards the Grand Canyon to get gas, fearing that there wouldn't be many more gas stops before we'd run out. We did find this "lovely" gas station that according to Guya could have been the muse for many horror movies. They did have this great statue though that I just couldn't resist not having a picture of! What a great sister to pose for me!

The picture below is the western end of Arizona, getting near the Hoover Dam and entry to Nevada. A happy sight nearing the end of a long journey.

That is until we get to this....major stopped traffic waiting to cross the Hoover Dam. It took us nearly an hour to get through this. Of course traffic heading the opposite direction was nonexistent.

So what do you do to entertain yourself and two little ones while stuck in traffic? You start with playing with the automatic window controls....up....down...up...down....oh! maybe trying it with my foot might be fun.

Then you play with the camera and setting sun.

Not thrilled with the limited angles and the uncooperative subjects, you try something new. Ahhhh! Let's see who can make the silliest face!

Here's Big Boy's try....he got bored after this one and went back to watching a movie.

Here are a couple of Boopy's tries.

Guya did some really great ones, but I know she'd kill me if I posted them, although I just had to post this one.

To be fair, here's one of my crazy faces. Not too creative but crazy. I think I look a bit like a donkey. Not sure why, I just do.

Soon after crossing the Dam we saw the beautiful sunset off in the horizon as we headed in to Las Vegas to Guya's house for the night.

Friday morning, we had a nice breakfast and then caravaned with Guya and Uncle D home to Fresno. They were coming back with us for Guya to help host a bridal shower for a good friend of hers and for Uncle D to get some kid time and just hang out. We got home close to 7 in the evening and were so glad to be done. Although, Saturday brought two showers for me, the bridal shower and a baby shower to attend, then dyeing Easter eggs in preparation for Easter the next day, which is yet another post all to itself.

Motherhood

Ahhh.... the joys of motherhood... I so relate to this comic strip!

In light of my most recent post, I had to share today's comic.

Mama's Little Helper

I have a shadow that follows me around and REALLY likes to do whatever I do...wash dishes...dust and even vacuum. I haven't gotten her to help with the folding the laundry yet, although she does like to load the washing machine. I'm hoping in the next little bit I can switch from instructor to supervisor and she can start taking over! HeHe! Not sure how many child labor laws we may have broken but since she wanted to help, I figured "why not"! So, without further ado, here's my little helper in action last night!

EEG Catch-Up

Last Friday, as I mentioned in an earlier post, Big Boy had an EEG scheduled. This is being done as a follow-up to the two seizures he had earlier this year. Because he'd gone so long without a seizure the doctors want to run an EEG to double check everything is still okay and there are no new issues we should be concerned with. Honestly, I'm not concerned, but also feel it's better to be on the safe side. Big Boy has already had 2 EEG's in the past and each one has been clear with no abnormalities so I don't see why we'll have an issue with this one. Besides, it still stands that EVERY seizure he has had has been connected with a fever.

Because of the nature of the test, it was best that both Papa and I take Big Boy. Due to the fact that he needs to go to sleep during part of the test, we had to sleep deprive him the night before managing to keep him and us up until 11pm. I then woke him up around 5:15 am. I was actually a bit of a bad parent and climbed back in my bed to rest while poor Big boy sat in his room wide awake reading his books. Honestly, it doesn't matter what day of the week it is or the situation, Big Boy is a morning person and always wakes up wide awake and ready to start the day while Papa, Boopy and I are clearly NOT morning people. Anyhow....the poor kid got less sleep then usual to help make sure he would be good and ready to fall asleep at the 12:30 test time. I took him to daycare as normal and left work to pick him up after 11am. Papa meet me there so that we could ride in one car to make sure one of us could entertain Big Boy to keep him from falling asleep in the car on the way to Children's Hospital where the testing would take place. It worked and we made it there with a sleepy yet happy child.

Papa and Big Boy enjoyed the kids chairs and books while we waited to be taken back.

The nurses were very sweet and easy going with Big Boy trying to reassure him that it was not a big deal and he would be fine. He made friends with them by taking their pictures with my camera and sharing his Big Truck book. His apprehension was lessened by sitting up on the doctor table in between both Papa and me. They prepped his head for the electrodes and then left us to get him to sleep. It didn't take too long, although it did take both of us laying down sandwiching him on the tiny table not meant for three people to get him to sleep. I know Papa fell asleep and I easy could have if not for the fear of rolling off the table.

Once I knew Big Boy was asleep I notified the nurses and then attempted to roll him on his back for the test. Neither Papa (who I woke up) or I were able to do it without waking Big Boy up. He did however lay them nicely and let the nurses attached the electrodes, swaddle his head up and then us again to try to get him back to sleep. It too a bit longer this time, but his sleepy little body finally caved and he fell asleep allowing the nurses to officially start the test. Poor kid was only really allowed to sleep for about 15-20 minutes before we had to wake him up for the next part of the test. This part has a light that is flashed at him to see how the stimulus affects his brain waves. He was understandably not too happy about being woken up and made to look at flashing lights. We tried to have him do the last part which was to open and close his eyes for a matter of seconds, but didn't really get him to cooperate. For his age however, he really did great for being put through so much that he doesn't really understand. The nurses were able to get more than enough test material to have a sufficient EEG for our neurologist to read.

I didn't get any before pictures as the main goal at that point was snuggling and caring for Big Boy. I did snap this picture while he was sleeping. I didn't want to disturb him or affect the test with my flash so please excuse the quality of the picture taken in a mostly dark room.

The next set of pictures are after the test was done and taking off the head electrodes.

He got to pick out a couple of cool stickers for being such a good boy. He laid there without much of a fuss and let the nurse clean his head from all the stick stuff they had to use to get the electrodes to stay on. Yes, he definitely needed his hair washed that night!

Our big trooper with Papa, ready to go get Boopy and go home!

Grandma Carol - You will be missed!

I just took a call from my Dad almost an hour ago. Grandma Carol passed away peacefully around 10:00am this morning. She had been sedated for at least the passed four days.

• I cannot say how incredibly grateful, that Anne and I took the crazy leap of faith and took the long trip to Arkansas. What priceless memories we now have that we can never get back.
• I am so grateful that God awarded us the quality time and lined up our life in a manner to make it all work like clockwork.
• I am so grateful that Grandma got to see and enjoy Big Boy and Boopy in all their glory.
• I am so grateful that my Dad and Mom got out to visit and had almost better visit than us!
• I am so grateful that Grandma is no longer in pain and that Aunt Lynn was with her when she died.
• I am so grateful that Grandma Carol was MY grandma. She was such a positive person, so full of laughter and life even up to the end. Her charisma will ever be etched in my memories.

In order to share a bit more of Grandma in her healthier years, I've swiped some pictures from her MySpace page. And yes, even up until Feb this year she maintained a MySpace page! She was just that kind of "hip" Grandma!

Grandma - taken a year or so ago at a visit to their hometown of Chicago.

Grandma - taken in her pre-kid years. I believe the first one is from her "Stag" party!

Just a small snippet of the VERY full life she led! Yes, she birthed 12 kids! You read that right 12! No, this is not all of them. This is only about four or five. I believe some of them are my great Aunt's kids. Grandma Carol is the lady in the far back center of the picture closest to the turkey. My paternal Great Grandma (GG) is next to her. My grandpa is the guy on the right of the picture amongst the boys. My dad is the handsome guy right in the front left of the picture, all smiles!

Grandma, I love you.

Arkansas Trip - Part 2

Quick Edit to Part 1 - or better yet "Lesson on Acquiring Hotel Rooms"

I realized that I did not include a valuable lesson learned in my earlier post from the first part of our drive to Arkansas. Our first hotel stay in Albuquerque, proved to be fitness training for Guya and me. We arrived late, after 11:00 pm and Guya went into the Hampton Inn we found to get a room. They were pretty booked but told her they had one double bed room left we could have. We parted and then managed to load ourselves up with sleeping kids, backpacks, beloved blankets and suitcases to keep from having to make a second trip. We thought we were being smart. HaHa! We stumbled into the hotel, nearly dropping a kid or two, dropped the big suitcase which I managed to squat down just enough to grab the handle and put it back upright. The real trick wasn't the squatting is was keeping from peeing my pants since we were laughing at ourselves so hard and REALLY had to pee! I'm sure any outsider would have sworn we were drunk. So after picking up the suitcase we made it to the elevator, up 3 floors and to our room. Ahhh...we were going to rest...that is until we saw the trash on the floor and obvious uncleaned room. We nearly cried. By now the kids were awake and the thought of lugging everything back down made us miserable. Guya took the easy job and went back down to get another room. Miraculously they found another double bed room (hmmm....makes you wonder, huh?) and we gathered our stuff and went up another floor to a clean room. This room was better even if the toilet took two flushes to do anything and the sink didn't drain right.

So, lesson learned - check the hotel room BEFORE lugging everything out of the car and to the room!

Part 2

Upon arriving in Mountain Home, Monday morning, Aunt Kim guided us to the Hospice Home to visit Grandma Carol. The hospice center is fairly new and staffed with some of the nicest most hospitable people I've met. They have a family room stocked with a refrigerator, vending machines, microwave, tables, chairs, couches, two TVs, kid play area, collection of reading material and even a computer with Internet access! We spent some good quality time with Grandma that first afternoon until we could tell we were wearing her out. Around 3:oo pm or so Aunt Kim and Cousin Laurie (who was visiting from Illinois) led us to our hotel to drop off our stuff and we then followed them on to grandma's house to have dinner, hang out and visit with everyone.

The nurses were so sweet to bring in a couple of baby dolls for Boopy to play with. She enjoyed sharing them with Grandma.

Lots of love for Grandma.

Great picture of Grandma! Not taken by me but by Big Boy! Although I did have to do a bit of cropping, he's getting pretty good with my camera!

The kids really enjoyed the play area. They had it all to themselves the whole time we were there. We even took the legos into Grandma's room for them to play with while we visited.

Big Boy and Aunt Kim do some bonding.

Back at Grandma's house, Monday evening. Grandpa Frank had put in these crazy monkey weather veins in their front yard that has become the trademark for the house. Boopy really loved getting to check out the monkeys.

Uncle Tim scored big points when he pulled out two boxes of matchbox cars for the kids to play with! I think he had nearly as much fun as the kids!

Hanging out with Laurie & Aunt Kim at Grandma's house.

There's nothing more fun than making Boopy have a crazy face! At least she loves her Aunt Guya enough to let her torture her!

After a rousing game of attack Uncle Tim, the kids were rewarded by homemade chocolate milkshakes. I think they ended up being a bit more like chocolate milk when Big Boy poured a little too much milk in the mixer. Regardless, they enjoyed them!

Tuesday morning brought a little bit of excitement to our stay in Mountain Home. While getting ready in the morning to go to see Grandma, the fire alarm went off in the hotel. I stuck my head out the door and asked some hotel employees who happened to be in the hallway if the alarm was real. I told Guya and I don't think I've seen her ever get dressed that fast! Guya grabbed Big Boy, his shoes and the diaper bag while I grabbed Boopy, her blanket, the camera bag and purses. We literally ran down the stairs not sure what to expect when we got down to the lobby. We were ushered outside with the everyone else. Actually everyone else only ended up being hotel employees. All the other guests apparently had decided to stay in the rooms and wait for smoke before they believed the alarm. Needless to say, we enjoyed a nice adrenaline rush just to be told to it was safe to return to our room. There indeed was no fire but the sprinkler system had a pipe burst or some storm water had gotten in and triggered the alarm. Better safe than sorry though - especially with the little ones. At least the alarm didn't phase the kids, they just went along for the ride. Either they are really easy going or they're just used to Mama & Auntie "Guya" acting slightly crazy. Perhaps a little bit of both!

After our hotel excitement, we checked out of the hotel, assuring them it had nothing to do with the alarm, it was just that our Uncle invited us to save the cash and stay with the family at Grandma's house. We loaded our stuff in the car, in the pouring rain and headed down to see Grandma. Grandma had had a rough morning so far so after only 5 minutes it was obvious she needed to rest so we went to the family room to hang out for a while. In our down time while Grandma was resting we enjoyed visited with Aunt Deb, Aunt Kim, Cousin Laurie. This was taken Tuesday afternoon, just before Aunt Kim & Laurie had to leave. It was nice that our visits overlapped. With everyone living all over the United States we rarely ever see each other in person. It was also during this time that we had some good heart to hearts with our parents and encouraged them to go ahead and come out now to assure a quality goodbye with Grandma. Based on her status and recommendations from the nurses, there was not question that if Dad wanted to visit with Grandma while she wasn't sedated he needed to come soon. It didn't take Dad to book a ticket for him and Mom into Tulsa, OK for the next night. (Mountain Home isn't really near any airports and is only 4 hours from Tulsa or Little Rock)

Aunt Deb, Aunt Kim, Big Boy, Laurie, Guya, Boopy